For some years now I've been involved in a local bi community, and have been on the committee of an organisation which provides support and engages in raising bi-visibility.
I am increasingly feeling like the proverbial Sisyphus because not only does it feel like that we are continually having to stick our hand up to say, 'don't forget about us' within the LGbTI (lower case 'b' intentional, see this post) communities, but I also feel like there is a lack of willingness to stand up and be engaged by those who identify as 'b' or otherwise attracted to more than one gender.
Even on our committee (which is currently two members short because we haven't been able to recruit people after two resigned due to personal/paid work reasons), only a few of us actively engage and respond to matters raised on a regular basis, including volunteering our time to attend events and working on the website and/or social media. There are also a couple more active than I am, and I look at them with admiration and wonder.
Honestly, I'm not trying to place slights against anyone for not being as engaged (although I acknowledge that some people may take what I have this way). I recognise everyone has full and busy lives that can lead to not having the time or energy. However, those of us who do engage also often have full and busy lives and yet we make it a priority to do so because we feel it is important to keep pushing the cause. For me personally, I see it as important because bisexuality seems far more maligned and forgotten than people who are gay or lesbian, and we have far worse health outcomes (see The Bisexuality Report for a recent literature review) than people who are monosexual.
After having a conversation with a friend who has been engaged in activism, including bi-activism, for over two decades and hearing their frustrations with the lack of engagement by others in the latter I can all but seriously ask, "Why is this so?".
We had this conversation as I was attending a meeting with a peak LGbTI organisation that evening to ask them to help us engage in raising the awareness and acceptance of bisexuality and multi gender attraction. In the end, however, I fear that I came across as exasperated about how little we seem to be able to engage people who experience multi gender attraction in the cause also. Looking at other countries, I feel that the case is similar to our own region, and during the meeting another attendee mentioned how they had heard similar frustrations expressed by a bi-activist in New South Wales who had felt the need to step back for the same reasons.
Since attending this meeting I have been seriously considering not nominating to be on the committee of the bi group because I don't know if I am doing myself or the community much good service when I attend a meeting and express this exasperation I feel. I will continue to assess how I feel on this as the elections for the committee are due in October. If I decide to not continue being on the committee, I hope that I will be able to continue to contribute in less formal ways when I feel capable.
I would like to hear from others (regardless of geolocation) about the following:
- If you don't engage in bi-activism, what do you see as barriers to doing so?
- If you do engage in activism (bi, or otherwise), how do you keep yourself motivated? Do you feel like you're getting support from a broad section of your peers or does your experience reflect mine insofar as there's little engagement coming from many?
- If you are involved in activism across different areas including bi-activism, have you observed a lower participation rate in bi-activism in comparison to other areas?
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| The Bisexual Umbrella, from this post on Radical Bi, a blog by Shiri Eisner. |
Hi Kathi (I think you're the author?)
ReplyDeleteFirstly I want to thank you for prioritising bi folks in your activism. It means a lot to me when anyone prioritises our visibility and welfare. It sounds like it has been a hard slog!
I have been an activist and bi identified since the early 90s, a time when there seemed to be higher bi visibility in the queer community and progressive political circles in Australia (where I live). I have not been involved in bi activism in an ongoing way. I have tended to see common cause with broad queer liberation struggles, or put my energy into other political projects. One thing that I have done is speak at queer conferences on bi inclusion and hold bi caucuses at queer events. It has always been really heartening to connect with bi folks, but we are an incredibly diverse bunch - fun to meet up with, hard to build ongoing groups with!
The problem you speak of, of little engagement and much work on the shoulders of a few, is familiar to all walks of activism. Perhaps it is exacerbated in bi activism because we are a small constituency, because of the internalised oppression we carry, or because we don't always experience the pointy end of bi oppression (I have probably been most involved in bi activism when single or early in relationships, in longer relationships it gets cosy being same sex or opposite sex partnered and bi-ness seem less of a big deal for me - sorry if that is hard to hear!) so we don't prioritise fighting it as much.
When I have seen bi activism it does tend to be led by tenacious individuals and it has often looked challenging. When I have stepped up as a bi activist it has only been with support I have directly sought out, and this has tended to be queer allies not bi identified folks.
Some questions back to you:
What first motivated you to engage in bi activism?
When have you felt most fulfilled as a bi activist?
What has sustained you in your bi activism? What support or sustenance could you access in the future?
Here's a little of my story: http://biwomenboston.org/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/28-3-Fall_2010.pdf (page 3-4)
You may also be interested in my shared blog on activist health and wellbeing: http://plantothrive.net.au/
Wishing you all the best
Holly
Kathi-answers
DeleteWhat motivated me to engage in Bi activism?
Anger! Definitely anger at being rendered invisible…..anger bordering on rage actually. Wish I could say it was ‘for the common good of humanity’, or something, but actually it sort of was too!
When have I felt most fulfilled in bi activism?
I would have to say that it is the informal chats I have had with people at queer events-bi, straight, trans, queer etc and also the informal chats with friends (a handful-mostly ‘straight’ as it happens), workmates (a few have been very supportive) and family (a few have been very supportive).
What sustains me, where would I seek support?
Anger at all the invisibility that you have mentioned in your post-this sustains me or the need to ‘put it right’ I guess.
Also I think there really needs to be an ‘affirmative action’ approach from the BGILT-(acronym stolen from Sally community), particularly from those in formal positions who organise queer conferences etc.-A bit like the ‘girls can do anything’ push in the seventies/early 80s for those old enough to remember. This could involve, for example, requests at conferences for a certain quota of bi presentations and a firm push for attendees to attend the talks that are under represented.
Thanks for raising the issue Kathi and yes, Holly I agree with your points too-thanks for sharing.
cheers,
Mary
Hi I am a bisexual man who is active in a bisexual group in Chicago. I have been out as bisexual since I was 17. The bi group in my city did not organize until 2010 and I became involved in 2011. When I became involved the first thing I needed to do is heal from over 20 years of biphobia. And it was very painful for me in particular as I was actually kicked out of my father's home as a teenager. Only to find myself kicked out of an LGB group in my college. I had to go through a process of rage and grief before I became more active. Having done so I realized that their are certainly other men and women out there who need support so I will continue to be involved. A lot of the rage and grief was around experiencing the rejection from both communities and digesting the fact that no matter what I said, no matter who I dated, I was continually misperceived and misunderstood. However I recently talked to other bi men who are in opposite gendered relationships and they feel comfortably divorced from the LGBT community even though a substantial portion of their lives have been in same gendered relationships. Similarly I know several bi men and women who feel comfortably assimilated into the gay and lesbian community. I think bisexual activists need to appeal to broader vision that helps inspire people to participate regardless of the gender they happen to be with.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing your thoughts and your experiences. I was sorry to read about the monosexist/biphobic experiences, which are unfortunately all too common.
DeleteI am curious if you have any thoughts on how bi activists might "appeal to broader vision that helps inspire people to participate"?
Thanks so much for your post. I appreciate your thoughtfulness, and I appreciate your activism and the thoughts of the other commenters.
ReplyDeleteI had bi organising as one of my main areas of activism over more than a decade. I am now doing much less in that area but have continued to raise it and write about it. Someone else has taken to organising bi events in my city recently after a hiatus in which there was nothing bi specific, and I've had some interesting conversations with her.
I think activism has always been a sport for a minority of the population. I am engaging in some experiments at present around other forms of activism--trying to do things differently with a view to trying to create forms of activism that might be workable for myself and others in these neoliberal times when I see activism as facing multiple challenges--I conclude that attracting a lot of people who want to be active is always complex. Some factors are obvious and others less so. At this point in history we have tough government policy, the dominance of precarious work and long working hours for some and poverty for more and more people, high levels of anxiety and despair, expectations which serve to support consumption (and hence profit) applied to every domain of life including social change... conditions for activism are changing and challenging and new forms are coming into being.
Factors specific to bi activism that I notice include the immense fear so many bi folk struggle with. Qualitative research studies show that it is there, and going to meetings where new people are so scared they can hardly sit down makes it obvious. Our people fear what may be done to them because of their bi identities and relationships. They have low levels of support. The research data suggests low income, poor health, and ongoing misery and distress (sometimes summarised with mental health labels) get in the way more so than for straight, G and L people.
To be honest, I think that the approaches some of us have adopted in order to get through periods where we had no support and where we may have experienced exclusion and poor treatment in places we hoped for solidarity get in the way of organising. Organising is a collective endeavour but many of us have taken up rebellious attitudes and combative ways of interacting as survival strategies and these take a long time to peel off once we notice we no longer need them or that we are among people who want to work with us and not against us.
We also continue to struggle with lower levels of out bi folk than G and L people. The research data shows this is how it is--and it doesn't help activists. We face that chicken and egg situation where we need activism so we can put people in a position to come out, but we need more out folks to do the activism.
Mmm. The love and solidarity of friends and near and dear sustains me. Messages from the wilds of the internet like your post cheer me on. And I think it is only human to long for connection and community. This drives me to build relationships and build community. I try to treat times of discouragement as temporary. Anger does sometimes spur me on. I try to always remember that different times lie ahead and that I can be part of shaping them. I accept that all activism is a long term endeavour. And that rests are necessary. I am grateful for all you do and for all signs of constructive life.
I wanted to express my sincere thanks to everyone who has posted a comment to my post.
ReplyDeleteAside from wishing that more people would engage at a local level, I can feel that a few of us are engaging in this (worthy) cause without knowing if the rest of the multi gender attracted folk
* know what is happening,
* this matters to them on some level,
* if the actions we take are what is wanted or needed, and
* we're making a difference to people's lives.
Essentially I do find myself feeling like one of the few voices in the wilderness at times.
Reading the posts above, I don't feel quite so alone in this. Thank you for your heart-warming and open sharing.
I think there’s probably a few reasons why there can be some real barriers and challenges to getting and keeping a significant number of people involved with bi politics. Some of them are the same challenges of being involved with a minority group, or having a minority sexuality, but some are probably more specific to bi issues (as even though gay and lesbian people are officially statistically less, they have a far greater number of visible advocates and activists comparatively).
ReplyDeleteSome of these factors I think include: the limits of identification (and identity politics) and correspondingly how ‘out’ people are; the issue of lack of visibility (and secure ‘identity’) as a draw card; the disparateness of political aims and goals for the bi movement (and the diversity of people within it); as well as the more general issues of people’s varying interest in activism and the limits to energy levels generally.
In terms of identity, I wonder whether possibly many people find the bi label either confronting, limiting (with its focus on ‘two’ genders) or stodgy – I know numbers of people who have loved multiple genders but not embraced the label. It also is fairly broad – anyone from a Kinsey 1 to Kinsey 6 could be included potentially, making it a vague identifier for some. Given the diversity of people it embraces, the bi community has had quite broad goals (from inclusion as the B in queer groups and overcoming stereotypes and invisibility, to advocating on poly issues and radically deconstructing sexual identities) – it has not necessarily had the narrow political focuses of say the gay men’s (decriminalisation, HIV and now marriage) or lesbian (feminism, marriage, children) communities. So some might feel ‘well, what do we want or stand for?’. No doubt just as a lot of gay and lesbian people are unpolitical, more focussed on social or sexual engagement, so quite a number of bi people are – being activist is just not their interest per se.
Another challenge specifically with the bi community is that while it is small, many bi closeted people may feel it is not worth the risk to come out, because the ‘payoff’ is worse than the risk of what they might lose (particularly getting prejudice from both straights and gays). As they become part of a bigger community that offers more support that would obviously change, but the challenge of having a smallish community (compared to the gay men’s or lesbian communities) is that its lack of size at the beginning may be off-putting for some. It also means activism within the community is more challenging, as there is less people to do it and more risk of burnout for those that do.
And of course there is still a lot of underlying biphobia and monosexism in this society, linked to ‘compulsory’ monogamy, both of which I think are some of the biggest ‘taboo’ areas in our culture still.
All of this means of course bi activism is very important and necessary, but there are some major significant challenges. I also have to say, as a bi man, I haven’t always found *all* bi spaces to be equally welcoming and open. I have had involvement with the community for a decade or so on and off, and while that has been very supportive at times, other times I have had to deal with other individuals putting their definition of what ‘bi’ is on to me, rather than allowing me to be it in the way it works for me. I also think that bi men and bi women and bi trans people have some similar and some different issues and experiences, and as a bi man I haven’t always found that the issues of bi men have been necessarily well handled or explored, which has at times made me ambivalent about political engagement. Nevertheless I have undertaken various forms of activism about bi issues over the years personally. But equally I also undertake activism around queer issues, feminist issues, environmental, social justice and other issues – because my activism is broader than just sexual identity issues.